A Turning Point?
M calls me at random yesterday, ranting and raving about her boyfriend (define irony, calling your estranged husband to bitch about your boyfriend). Sounds like those two fell off the cliff, into the rocks and then got launched out to sea. I guess they are done. Oh well for them. I did use it to open a dialogue for the kids’ benefit though.
Me: If you ever decide to move back up here, you would definitely get more time with them. Just saying.
M: Im thinking on it. Truly really hard.
Me: We don’t have to fight over them. Meet me half way, schedule a visitation hearing and let’s at least end that part of this stupid fight.
M: Right now, im willing to agree to just about anything. Cops are on their way here, now. I kicked him in the shin, for trying to run my pets off!
Me: Well, be careful. You kicking him is assault.
M: He was assaulting y cats and dog!
Me: The cops won’t see it that way
M: Of course not, hes on the vfd and ex mil.
Me: And just so we’re clear, if you move back up, you and I are never going to be together again. You will just get to be an active part of their lives.
M: Right now, i just want him gone.
M: Im done with relationships.
[phone lost signal while we were discussing visitation when she called at her usual time to talk to the kids]
Me: 3 story apartment buildings suck for signal
Me: David wants to talk
M: Lol.
[She called back and talked to the kids more. Her and I having civilized conversation got the kids to open up to her more and talk more on the phone.]
Around 2200hrs
M: Sorry to unload on you like that earlier.
Me: It’s whatever. If it gets an actual dialogue opened between us, then so be it. Rather ironic that you were complaining to your husband about your boyfriend though. Lol
M: It really is hilarious, isnt it. And he and i broke up the 1st full week of january. When a man has to think abt if he loves a woman, he doesnt. Dead horse beat
[More irony]
Me: Kind of like when a woman has to think about if she loves a man. Been there, done that.
M: Yup. It doesnt hurt any less. I go to dr tomorrow after work abt my hip.
M: He just went too far today threatening my pets. Theyre all i really have right now and he just went too far. And if i coulda knocked his ass down and out…
Me: I’m glad the kids weren’t there to witness that.
Me: Are you doing the hip through your insurance or Tricare?
M: Tricare. My insurance has a copay. They just got me an ortho doc this past week. Supposed to be the best in the state.
M: And i agree. Im glad the kids didnt see it.
Me: Let me know how soon they can get you scheduled. I don’t plan on waiting long to file once my income tax comes In.
M: Ok. But this is my 1st appt with him/her. It took them this long to get me a reg doc who is taking patients.
M: Im going to bed now. 0415 Come early and ive been keeping migraines, losing sleep, and losing weight due to stress and bs lately.
Me: Good night. Glad we can at least talk now.
M: I am, too. good night. And ill try to be moved up before thanksgiving at the latest. Ive bills here to pay first and money to save.
Me: Just as long as you get the visitation hearing before then. Your dad’s paying for the lawyer, might as well use her.
M: They keep sticking so many hidden shit in there it pisses me off!
Me: ?
M: Yeah…night.
Me: Ok
M: Shit like “we were only pd for this, and thatll be xtra” stupidity…
Me: Yep, $75 an email with mine.
M: Lol. My emails are free during business hrs. 300 After and on weekends. I told mine i dont expect replies after hrs or on weekends so not to expect me to pay
Me: Anyway, get some sleep. I’m going to rack out too. Gotta get up and make eggs and bacon in the morning.
M: For a reply when i know it can wait til business hrs. That i dont ask them to reply on weekends or after hrs or even want them to.
M: Nite
Me: Good night
At least we can finally talk without her immediately jumping to cussing me out. If we can just play nice, maybe we can settle this stuff and she can start focussing on our children. It’s been a long time since they were her priority. I will remain cordial in order to finalize the process and set a visitation schedule. We have at least 13 more years before we can completely wash our hands of one another.
Let’s all say a prayer that she gets her life in order and becomes an active participant in Rose and Dave’s lives.
The line that she said last night that stuck most in my mind? “Chris, I have made such a f$&k up of my life.” The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem and realizing that it is you. My response, “Our job now is to ensure that we don’t screw up our kids, Morgan.”
January 29, 2013 | Categories: Life, Military Life | Tags: child custody, child visitation, Divorce, making amends, open dialogue, realizations, Separation, text messages | Leave a comment
November 12th Conversations
M: I cant make it up for thanksgiving. Theyre demanding i work that day and i cant get off. But i will be up for christmas.
Me: And to think, you could have had them for thanksgiving and a week at Christmas.
M: Look, chris, i work a civilian job, unlike you, i cant take paid time off. And unlike you if i dont do as my boss says, i get fired.
Me: Whatever, dude. They won’t notice.
M: You could bring them to me, so they can spend it with me, i know you have the time off.
Me: At this point, since you have been unwilling to come to an agreement with me, I’ll do what the court orders. I am done trying to accommodate you.
M: I dont want to hear you get preachy about coparenting anymore. If youll recall, I SIGNED YOUR AGREEMENT, you did not. Youre only interested in your wants, not
Me: No, I am interested in their welfare, which you continue to prove that you are not. Disrupting their routine, selfish and you know it. All you had to do was remove that one portion and we would have had an agreement. You CHOSE to leave without doing so. YOU are the selfish one Morgan. Good night.
M: Not at all in theirs. And you say im selfish? You have the time off and are unwilling to cooperate at all. Youre not interested in “coparenting” at all.
Me: I am not interested in providing for you when every goddamned time I have tried coming to an agreement with you, you have put bullshit limitations and additions into it. So, when you are ready to get a visitation hearing, I’ll be there with these messages. If they mattered to you, a fucking job wouldn’t keep you from them. Simple as that. Good night.
Tonight’s conversation, after she told the kids she was taking them home with her on December 26th and I was forced to be the bad guy, telling them that all though they may see Mommy, they will not be going home with her.
M: I would truly like to have the kids from 9 am dec 26 until 9am jan 1 as you previously stated i could. I already made arrangements with work so i could
Me: Then have your lawyer get it before a judge, M. I tried to work with you. I am not going to point this out again. My lawyer agrees that until we have a binding legal document, my not wanting them to go anywhere with you is perfectly acceptable. I am fine with them going with you, as long as we have a signed visitation order. Get one and we’re good to go.
December 4, 2012 | Categories: Life, Military Life | Tags: bad mother, cheating wife, child custody, child visitation, delusional women, Divorce, Separation, text messages, tired of the shit | Leave a comment
Just Another Day…
M: I cant make it up for thanksgiving. Theyre demanding i work that day and i cant get off. But i will be up for christmas.
Me: And to think, you could have had them for thanksgiving and a week at Christmas.
M: Look, chris, i work a civilian job, unlike you, i cant take paid time off. And unlike you if i dont do as my boss says, i get fired.
Me: Whatever, dude. They won’t notice.
M: You could bring them to me, so they can spend it with me, i know you have the time off.
Me: At this point, since you have been unwilling to come to an agreement with me, I’ll do what the court orders. I am done trying to accommodate you.
M: I dont want to hear you get preachy about coparenting anymore. If youll recall, I SIGNED YOUR AGREEMENT, you did not. Youre only interested in your wants, not
Me: No, I am interested in their welfare, which you continue to prove that you are not. Disrupting their routine, selfish and you know it. All you had to do was remove that one portion and we would have had an agreement. You CHOSE to leave without doing so. YOU are the selfish one Morgan. Good night.
M: Not at all in theirs. And you say im selfish? You have the time off and are unwilling to cooperate at all. Youre not interested in “coparenting” at all.
Me: I am not interested in providing for you when every goddamned time I have tried coming to an agreement with you, you have put bullshit limitations and additions into it. So, when you are ready to get a visitation hearing, I’ll be there with these messages. If they mattered to you, a fucking job wouldn’t keep you from them. Simple as that. Good night.
Just in case anyone missed it, I am done trying to do anything for her. I have tried on multiple occasions to get a visitation schedule set, and this is how she wants to go about it? Screw that. They are happy, healthy and where they belong. Enough said.
November 12, 2012 | Categories: Life, Military Life | Tags: continuing idiocy, custody, Divorce, holidays, parenting, text messages, visitation, wtf | 2 Comments
Some things never change
Me: May I make a suggestion? You have until February before I can file. Get your hip fixed.
M: Why are you suddenly worried about my hip…?
Me: Honestly, I have thought about it several times. I am surprised you haven’t done it yet.
M: Ive just been waiting for my insurance to kick in.
Me: Tonight, after talking to you, I decided I don’t hate you anymore and I really do hope we can be amicable and working co-parents in their continued development.
Me: You still have Tricare. It won’t cost you any co-pays.
M: Neither will mine. With my work i have full benefits. And i stopped hating you months ago. Its not easy to do, its easier to hate, but its not healthy.
Me: I don’t hate you Morgan. I am at a point where I still get exasperated by your actions, but mostly I just feel sad that you are unwilling to talk with me in a rational manner about what is best for our children.
M: Because we always fight and im sick of fighting.
Me: And I haven’t tried fighting with you, Morgan. I have remained calm even when you start ranting at me. (I.e., visiting at the coffee scene, the whole visitation snafu on the 17th). I am done fighting with you. I pay a lawyer thousands to do that for me. My only priority is the safety, health and happiness of our children, Morgan. They are safe, they are healthy and they are happy. They miss you and I want them to spend time with you, but until we have an order signed by a judge, you give me no reason to trust you. Your lawyer received a schedule that saw you spending 90% of their school breaks with them. When I had an issue with 1 item on your lawyer’s proposal, you claim I “threw it in your lawyer’s face.” I simply told her that it would not work as it stood with that last sentence on there. Had she simply scratched that, we would have a signed visitation agreement.
Me: There is no sense in fighting about something that has already expired. And maybe it was just the damned lawyers looking for a reason to charge us more money.
M: Lawyers are greedy bastards, but its the way of human. Look, im going to bed. I have to be up at 415 to get ready for work. Kiss my babies for me. Good night.
Me: Morgan, we need to come to an agreement on visitation for Rose and Dave. They deserve that.
Me: You’ll receive a recommendation from me through the lawyers.
M: Chris, i had no problem with the one suggessted. All i wanted was to be allowed to take my kids to school and you couldnt even allow me-or them-that small thing
Me: I am not going to give you my reasoning again. You know our daughter as well as I do and you know how throwing her off her routine effects her.
M: Good night, im finished talking to you for now. Please do not text me again tonight unless theres and emergency w/ ro or dave or unless 1 of them wants to call.
Because when she knows I am right, suddenly I am “harassing” her. I really do pity her at this point. She can’t get past herself for our children. That’s just sad. Why do I even bother anymore? Maybe because our son and daughter asked to see their mother today and I had to explain to them that she was in a different state.
November 3, 2012 | Categories: Life, Military Life | Tags: children, custody, Divorce, exes, pity, really?, text messages, visitation | Leave a comment
Texting With A Lunatic
Whore: Since yoou didnt answer, im at your apartment get the kids for my visitation. Police officer with me
Me: That’s cute. When we are back in nc, I will show the officer the actual court documents showing that you have zero rights at this time.
Me: And play the recording of you admitting that your DSS report was false as well.
Me: I will be happy to verify on monday morning when the court is open if such instrument exists. Until i can verify, i will act in the best interest of our children and keep them in my custody.
Whore: Ill be happy to meet you there and it states we are to come to agreemens for visitation ouselves. Our visitations were preagreed on.
Me: You made a false report, fully knowing our child is autistic and says the most random things. I will happily bring along several witness statements to that particular call, proving that our daughter was merely pissed she had to get out of the pool to talk I you. As primary custodian, you have to be more flexible to my schedule. With your false report, we can wait until the judge orders the visitation setting.
Whore: Shut up and stop talking to me. Ill talk to my kids tonight.
Me: We were court ordered to custody mediation, obviously that does not mean that we will be doing it ourselves. You know our children are safer with me than they ever were with you anyway. With the stipulations you tried to enforce last month, it is clear that the only motivation you have towards our children is financial.
Whore: Why so youy can beat them like you did to me?
Me: Never did that. And they are much safer with me. According to the judge Stiehl, DSS, your own family, Rose’s nurses, doctors and social workers at Duke, my family, our former mutual friends, the state of NC, the state of Alabama, Judge Alex Brown (Lamar County, AL).
Whore: Stop harrassing me
Me: This is in regards to visitation and custody. It is not harassment. It is discourse on how to solve our problem, but we will have the judge make the visitation plan until the custody order has been signed. Can you please tell me date and time order was signed?
Me: Feel free to send me a photo of each page of the document and I will be happy to conform once I have verified.
Whore: Jiust call your lawyer.
Whore: And beth and nikki are not my family. We have no and never had mutual friends, i was never welcome in your family and i have over 15 people willing to testify
Me: And I can provide the same amount of people who aren’t liars.
Whore: For me. I also have 2 eye witnersses who can describe the beating you gave me when i was 8 mos pregnant with dave. And i dont want child support from you.
Me: Ha! Eye witnesses huh? I would have gone to jail if that were true. Your liars really aren’t helping you.
Whore: This conversation is finished. Anything more from you is harassment and WILL be treated as such.
She likes to resort to that when I point out the facts. Being a stupid whore must be challenging when you are in a battle of wits. I have received no signed order, no notification of a signed order and until I have, my children will remain safely in my care.
July 14, 2012 | Categories: Blogging, Life, Military Life | Tags: cheating wife, custody battle, delusional cunt, Divorce, fucktard, full of shit, lies, nasty divorce, text messages, texting | 10 Comments
Falling Down to Me 